Eight days a week

What do lawyers base their billing hours on?

The naked and the dead

What do you get when a strip club merges with a mortuary?

Fruit of the zoom

What do you get when you mix metamucil, prune juice and green-apple sauce?

Heart felt

What beats in the breast of a Raggedy Anne doll?

Sweet breads

What's neither sweet nor bread, and first cousin to gopher guts?

Bush meet

Where did the rhododendron hook up with the tumbleweed?

Audit trail

Where do IRS agents hike?

Paralegals

What did Tweedle Dumb and Tweedle Dumber become after they passed the Bar?

Budapest

What do you call an annoying Asian God?

Looking for a solemate

What did the flounder say to the footpad?

Goal digger

What do you call a scoring greedy soccer player?

Power outage

What's the opposite of a power onage?

Fractal theory

What did Humpty Dumpty unwittingly discover?

Platonic

What's a drink unlikely to lead to romance?

Apatite

What does a hungry rockhound have?