Shark Tank idea (revised)
(Theme music)
(VO:
Next in the Tank is a situation that the Sharks have never seem before in the history of the show.
(One cloaked large object on stage center)
Entrepreneur:
Good evening, sharks.
The first thing I'm not going to tell you is my name and where I'm from. Because I don't want to take the spotlight away from you. You know there's a lot of talk these days about the separation between the rich and the average on this planet. Between the billionaires and the average Joe. All of you are doing your best to help that. I salute you and applaud you.
(Entrepreneur salutes and claps)
The second thing I'm not going to tell you is my "ask " for this situation. That is because it has come into being only here and now, before you.
Dear honorable sharks, the next thing I can't tell you is sales. That's because this whole situation has never ever been for sale before. To me that would have been like ripping my heart out, tearing an arm off, or throwing myself into a car crusher. Until now. And I'll get into the reasons for that in a moment, if you'd like.
If you want to know the landed cost, I have boxes and boxes of receipts, many yellowing and decades-old. That's because this all began over a half-century ago when I was still an undergraduate at Tufts University. It proceeded off and on from the fall of 1965. It involved California, Wisconsin Massachusetts, Ohio, Tennessee, Canada, Germany, Switzerland, England, New York and too many more places to mention. When did this all end? Right here and now.
What's my CAC? Well right now I have no customers. So there's no cost to acquire them. However you can change that. You can be the first and only one.
But I can disclose what the percentage is I'm offering.
(Pause)
One hundred.
(Chyron insert reads;
???? for 100%)
That means if we do a deal it's yours. But there won't be any work involved to follow up. You'll understand in a moment.So I don't want to squander more of your valuable time.
(Entrepreneur pulls the cloak off the object.)
( Sharks are heard to exclaim: what the heck, oh my God, and wow.)
Entrepreneur:
Now what you have before you ladies and gentlemen, is a large and powerful custom-built motorcycle.
Now sharks, I understand some of you are very high on 21st century things like non-fungible tokens, block chain technology and cryptocurrency. Well what is being offered to you is the ultimate answer to that. Besides being a unique of art, this two wheeled vehicle is a non-fungible object. What do I mean by that?
It is absolutely, one of a kind. No copies or duplications or replicas anywhere in the world. Blockchain technology is not needed to prove that. Nor can it be fungible with cryptocurrency or any other currency. It is its own currency because it is priceless. If or when civilization crashes and takes cryptocurrency and the blockchain with it, this object will remain priceless.
How am I able to say that? Because this is not a reproducible motorcycle that was built from a kit. I created, designed and commissioned it. I know literally every single part, every single nut and bolt, every single assembly in it. I have been a custom motorcycle builder and photojournalist for the past 50 years. So I perhaps know what I am talking about.
But let's start at the beginning.. My journey began when I was a Tufts undergraduate student. In the summer after my high school graduation in 1965 I purchased my first motorcycle. It was a semi assembled monster and a big box of parts. My parents who were scientists could not understand why I would buy such a thing but they were not worried because it did not run. However I had not counted on a friend of mine named Scott France who knew about lawn mowers and go carts. So, we were able to get it running -- barely -- in a week or so. I then went off to college and spend my spare time rebuilding and improving this motorcycle.
So here's the thing about that bike. I never sold it and I still own it. And here it is.
(Image of the motorcycle appears in the displays stage left.)
During my college years I pretty much got a minor in motorcycling. I began to learn about the amazing diversity and engineering found in motorcycles from around the world and throughout the decades of the 20th century. I began to collect parts and ideas. I corresponded frequently with shops and sources in Germany, England and Switzerland. And America too.
I grew ideas, connections and big future plans. I became a motorcycle journalist and, before long, moved to California from Massachusetts. While I was there I begin to build custom motorcycles.
(Photo collage of motorcycles built appears on display)
But then life happened. I learned my father was dying of cancer. I came back east to spend one final year with him. I changed careers and worked in high technology. During the big 80s I designed and general contracted my own home. I wrote and published a book on aviation history. And I got married and then later, divorced. Not much time for motorcycles.
Then in 2014, like father like son. I received the six-letter diagnosis that no one wants to hear. Cancer. And it was a doozy of a case. My oncologist confided to her friend that she thought I had maybe five months. And after listening to her description of my affliction I took out a sheet of paper and figured out there were nine people in the entire world that had exactly my disease.
But in the immortal infomercial words, there's more.
Because now over a decade had passed. I mean how much more time did I think I could reasonably get. With this in mind a few years ago I decided to finally build the ultimate custom motorcycle. This drew on all my experience from half a century a building and photographing motorcycles. I began to gather parts, design concepts and ideas. I found Richard Jones of RHJj Retronation. He was the wizard able to help me take my raw material and bring it to reality.
Sharks, I now open the bidding. The winnet can it home to your man or lady cave. Put it on display, mount it on your mantel, or protect it under glass. Or, lady sharks of course you can give it to your significant other or son. Because, make no mistake, this js a 21 century object d'art.
It has been built as fully functional machine. I'd even start and run the engine here right now but I don't think the producers would be very happy about that. Consider this a trophy for your generosity, your initiative, your genius and helping keep the American dream alive.
Now finally I know that some of you more mercenary sharks are concerned about your exit strategy. One strategy is just to keep it forever as a trophy. But God forbid you want to sell it consider this. The fact that it's been on national television and has been owned by a shark only increases its value. Most likely a multiple of what you paid here. Pretty neat huh?
But please just one request. Riding this thing on a public road? That would be like using a Rodin sculpture as a door stop.
