Spiderman suffers from Arachnophobia
Goofy is developmentally delayed
Mr. Magoo cheated on his driver’s license test
Gladstone Gander wears a toupee
Donald Duck is going to a speech therapist and anger manager
Rocky takes ginger for motion sickness
Black Pete once failed to make it as a Werewolfe
Batman has tinnitus
Rat Fink daylights as a kindergarten crossing guard
(drum roll)
Bugs Bunny is now in assisted living due to Hypervitaminosis A
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