14. My dream date is sharing a vanilla pablum and a Casper milque toast with Plain Jane.
13. I play drums in a rock and roll bland.
12. Entertainment? I watch my old B&W TV with knobs for hours. Sometimes I even turn it on.
11. I write programs in BASIC.
10. I floss hourly.
9. My IQ equals my BMI.
8. My favorite protein is parboiled veal.
7.I drive a tricked-out cut-down custom unicycle
6. I dream in ones and zeros.
5. My preferred form of R&R is stupor.
4. I went to rehab for obsequious training.
3. I am nostalgic for static snow on TV.
2. I prefer velcro over shoelaces, zippers and door latches.
And (drum roll roll please)
1. I fly in an air- plain.
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