10. Wear an aramid/kevlar wetsuit. Omit deodorant.
9. Be ingested by an anaconda instead
8. Use a bigger boat
7. Bring wet vac. Suck it dry. Watch sharks asphyxiate.
6. Dress up as Shamu. They won’t mess
5. Conscript Johnny Cochran as your mouthpiece
4. Have Vladimir Putin and Steve Jobs negotiate for you
3. Get Barbara Corcoran and Lori Grenier into a fatal catfight
2. Smoke cigar, blow in Cuban’s face.
And….
1. Impersonate BP. Drill offshore. Leak oil. Kill all sharks.
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